About Imprisoning Myself and Also Bournes

DAY 29: My Goals for the Future 

This is coincidental and entirely fitting that I write about future goals on the horizon of a new year. And because I always complicate things if I can, and just listing some things I want to do seems easy, I did have to think about what would keep me from reaching my goals. 

If you can’t be reconciled with the roots of your history and the tragedies, sometimes you start to imprison yourself

These are words from a unnamed Swiss Mennonite Pastor. And although he was speaking in a broader sense, referring to Anabaptist history, and specifically to the persecution our ancestors endured and its lasting impact through many generations, I thought it was just as true on a personal level. It’s hard to move forward, or even to look ahead when I’m stuck in the past. If I’m trying to stomp down unforgiveness I thought I had modified to forgiveness years ago, or kicking myself for stupid decisions I made along the way, or holding onto things I should’ve changed long ago, I imprison myself.

On to goals. I’m not sure how I feel about goals. Actually I probably am sure. I like attainable goals, but also goals that contain some kind of challenge. I feel like goals don’t have to be enormous futuristic things. They can be menial and they can be immediate, which are the kind I’ll mostly list here. 

Goals. Bournes. I found a new word. New for me that is.

Bournes I’ve already begun and determine to continue include Continuing to learn French (I would like to be able to at least read and write French)even if I don’t ever speak it), Continuing to bond with the sunset/sky in general, Continuing to write regularly, whether on this blog for anyone to read or just for myself, Continuing my quest to visit every continent, something that’s been on my bucket list for like ever, Continuing to learn more things and meet more people who aren’t like me. That doesn’t mean I don’t value all of you who are like time.

Bournes I haven’t begun. 

Weave a massive rug. Learn how to make baskets out of I’m  not sure what. Learn to surf; Yes I do realized the unlikeliness of that. Learn to build things like with woods and tools and things like that. Relearn to knit. I’m out of ideas. 

I know there are more things I plan to do but tonight doesn’t seem to be the time to remember them. It’s been a long month of posting, intensified by having to stick to prescribed topics, something I knew to begin with I was kind of terrible at. These aren’t New Years resolutions because I don’t believe in the cliched ideals, having witnessed them fail more often than not. I believe in having attainable every day goals to go along with massive life-long ones and that I can add to my list of bournes any day of the year I want to. The end.