The Human Factor

Due to life (or the human factor) I never got yesterday’s post written, which I’m sad about. I’m going to post this instead of yesterday’s topic and continue trying again today. This is something I wrote a few months ago. I’ve been afraid to post it because I wrote this to myself.  I’m afraid of how preachy  it sounds, and I’m not sure how much sense it will make to my readers.  When I think about this, it reminds me to give people (including myself) a chance instead of immediately writing them off for their humanness. 

There are two parts to all your relationships:

There’s there person you want to be and the person you really are. 

There’s the relationship (marriage, friendship, mentorship) you think you’ll have, and the relationship you actually have. 

There’s the church (as in the people, not the building) we should be, and the one we actually are. 

This is a paraphrased quote from a talk I listened to once. It was not by any means the topic of the talk, but it’s basically the only thing I remember from that talk. It made me understand something a little better.

There’s one thing standing between me and that person i wanted to be, one thing stopping my relationship from becoming the one of my dreams. It’s the Human Factor. Being a human is  difficult. Humanness is real. Humans are imperfect. Humans have emotions, ideas.  Humans have actions. Humans speak, sometimes things they will later regret. 

The Human Factor. It’s not an excuse for the bad choices I make that end up ruining my day, maybe week, my life, someone else’s life. It’s not an excuse for swearing that accidentally slips from my mouth, breaking the months-long victory I thought I had won over that. It’s not an excuse for the lies I fabricate when i feel cornered. It’s not an excuse for the cutting manipulation that comes too easily and instantly kills any camaraderie. It’s not an excuse. But it’s the reason. 

So don’t give up on a friendship that’s been a little difficult lately. Give your friend or yourself the benefit of the doubt. Don’t get discouraged with trying and failing to have that conversation with your husband or wife or friend or parent or child. Give other people  or yourself a chance: We’re not perfect beings. Remember the human factor.